And how is it, you might wonder, that Cohen the columnist descended from Heaven to write such wonderful prose for the Hartford Business Journal.
Because they wanted me, that’s why — “they” being the proprietors of Various Business Journals and Stuff, Inc., a shadowy holding company based in the Cayman Islands that owns several business publications.
They wanted Cohen because he is a visionary — and you want someone writing columns who is not mentally ill, but still has visions.
The only other occupation that usually cries out for visionaries is school superintendent. You can’t hardly get through a help-wanted ad for a New England school superintendent, or listen to a Board of Education search committee lay out its strategy, without seeing and hearing the call for a visionary.
There it was this summer, when Pittsfield, Mass., was looking for a new superintendent. Oh, sure, Pittsfield wanted someone with “public relations skills” and “strong fiscal management.” But we all know what the town really wanted: A “dynamic, visionary educator.” Bingo.
In New Bedford, Mass., the search is on for a superintendent with “organizational vision,” which sounds like something you learn at the University of Connecticut business school, but soon forget.
The regional school district for the Connecticut towns of Burlington and Harwinton is crying out for a superintendent with “visionary thinking,’ which may or may not be sort of the same thing as a visionary educator or someone with organizational vision.
An English Lesson
Far be it from me to suggest that search protocols across New England pull adjectives from the same pail. Nuance is everything; school chief candidates with X-ray vision can sniff out differences among the various advertising.
The New Bedford help-wanted ad, for instance, describes the school district as “urban,” which visionary candidates know is code for lots of minorities and cranky city politics. The New Bedford schools are filled with “more than 13,200 multi-cultural students,” which is not really intended to say that every student is a melange of cultures, but designed to signal that you won’t find 13,000 Episcopalians chanting in unison from the Book of Common Prayer.
Equally challenging for a search committee is a community that sort of oozes snob appeal, but doesn’t want to seem smug.
The Natick, Mass., help-wanted ad described the town as “attractive and thriving” — and 17 suburban miles west of Boston. The new superintendent is invited to create “an exciting and dynamic educational environment.” How many advanced placement classes can dance on the head of a pin?
Honesty may or may not be the best policy. Rocky Hill, a middle-brow suburb of Hartford, is looking for a superintendent who can provide a “high quality educational program delivered in a cost efficient manner.” Whew. Can’t you just see that Board of Education’s Finance Committee, made up of three anti-tax activists and two CPAs with one eye in the middle of their foreheads? A school superintendent with vision will pick up on that.
Pittsfield, for instance, sought out a superintendent who could deliver “strong fiscal management,” which sounds less threatening than what is in store for the new fella in Rocky Hill.
‘Works Well With Others’
At least from the perspective of the superintendents, the search process seems to be going pretty well. According to Education Week newspaper, a recent summary of a survey of superintendents found that “school district leaders overwhelmingly have positive relationships with their school boards, tend to be satisfied in their jobs, and think of themselves as effective.”
This kind of employment Garden of Eden is due in large part to the clarity of the search process. If you’re some kind of bloodless corporate type who believes that the rabble should get out of the way and let you run the schools, don’t apply for the top spot at the Northview Public Schools in Grand Rapids, Mich. The district is looking for someone with “a collaborative management style and excellent communication skills.” Nothing about vision, though.
And with that, another visionary column comes to a close. I will be back, because, much like New Bedford, the Hartford Business Journal is about to offer me “a multi-year contract with competitive compensation, excellent benefits package, and ongoing opportunities for professional growth.”
Vision don’t come cheap.
Laurence D. Cohen is a freelance writer.
