All I wanted to do was to see a film in a quiet movie theatre. The lights dimmed, the movie started, and suddenly I saw the light. And that’s when the problem of modern technology and old-fashioned courtesy and respect for other people clashed.
The person sitting next to me took out his BlackBerry to check messages. Instead of being engrossed by the film, I became distracted by the bright light emanating from my neighbor’s technology. Every 15 minutes or so, he’d take out his BlackBerry to check messages, ruining my concentration on the movie. I wasn’t sure whether to ask him to stop being rude, which would have caused another distraction, or just let it go. I decided to let it go.
There is no question that computers, cell phones, BlackBerrys, global positioning systems and personal digital assistants make our lives easier.
But I wonder what price we pay in civility for this technology. As Walt Kelly’s Pogo once said in a classic comic strip, “We have met the enemy and he is us.” The problem isn’t the technology, but the people who use the gadgets without considering the rights of others.
Often I find that these high-tech wizardries promote rudeness. People yell when using their cell phones on most urban streets, on public buses and airplanes, in doctor’s offices and elevators, disrespecting other people.
Promoting Rudeness
James Katz, the director of the Center for Mobile Communication Studies at Rutgers University, noted, “If anything characterizes the 21st century, it’s our inability to restrain ourselves for the benefit of other people.” Cell phones are all about me, me, me, and forget about you, you, you.
Recently, at a restaurant a close friend of mine received a call from her 21-year-old son, asking her where the hot chocolate mix was located in the kitchen. A table of six sat paralyzed while she directed him through various cabinets to locate the hot chocolate.
Cell phones, of course, can be helpful during an emergency, but can also cause problems. Some states now have rules against driving while talking on cell phones. Most experts say that this is distracting and causes accidents, but most people think these rules don’t apply to them.
And most law enforcement personnel have placed little emphasis on enforcing these laws.
Since driving while on a cell phone can trigger traffic accidents, these laws should be stringently enforced.
The noted 20th century social historian Eric Hoffer once wrote, “Rudeness is the weak man’s imitation of strength.” I think people who shout when using their cell phones, holler in elevators, sit in movie theatres accessing messages, are trying to appear more important than the rest of us.
Their rudeness really says, “Look at how important I am.” It’s time that the other person’s rights for silence in a movie theatre and other public places are respected.
Here are my suggestions:
• The next time you’re about to get on your cell phone or use your BlackBerry, look around and see if anyone is going to be disturbed.
• If you’re in a busy restaurant or an elevator, call the person back or step outside so you don’t disturb your fellow diners or other people.
• If you must use the gadget, do so in a quiet, unobtrusive way because the world doesn’t revolve around your needs.
Mackay’s Moral: Technology is no excuse for rudeness.
Harvey Mackay is president of Mackay Envelope Corp. and a nationally syndicated columnist.
